This guest post is by Noelle Stern. Noelle is an author, editor, and writing coach. In her book, Trust Your Life: Forgive Yourself and Go After Your Dreams (Unity Books), she helps readers let go of regrets, re-label their past, and reach their lifelong yearnings. Visit Noelle at trustyourlifenow.comA simile, as our fourth-grade English teachers intoned, is a comparison of two, usually dissimilar, objects, with the use of “like” or “as.” To enliven our writing, similes can evoke the particular sense we want to transmit.
Photo by Christina Rutz
Many of our most now-trite similes were fresh when first used—Burns’ “my love is like a red, red rose,” Shakespeare’s “Shall I compare thee to a summer’s day?” But repetition and endless assignment in freshman English classes has made them as shopworn as the bargain table after a sale.
Simile Fatigue
It’s easy to succumb to overused and by now boring similes. You know the ones: eyes like stars, fits like a glove, swim (or smoke) like a fish, fierce as a lion, dead as a doornail, sleep like a log, dry as dust, smooth as silk, white as snow, cute as a button. When we write, they seem to spring up like spring flowers, I mean, like groupies at a rock star’s world tour.
I’m not against similes, although they’re less elegant than their more subtle, no-like/as cousins, the metaphors (her eyes were stars, he was a fierce lion in battle, the air was dust in my nostrils). But notice in the examples of similes above, and many more you can probably think of, that some of the objects compared make little sense today.
How dead is a doornail? Why is it deader than a screw or a staple? How does a log sleep? Does it twitch, snore? How cute is a button? What if it’s a button on the jumpsuit of a prisoner? Or the black coat of a funeral director?
I encountered the tired-simile syndrome with a recent passage in a novel and, desperate for freshness, developed a method to create better similes. Describing the arms of a middle-aged mother, I first wrote, “They were like . . .” and several barely passable similes spewed out: “like bowling pins,” “like tree trunks,” “like sausages,” “like pieces of wood.” Each of these felt either too old (bowling pins) or not quite right (tree trunks were too big, sausages needed adjectival spice, pieces of wood felt stagnant).
Reaching for Surprising Similes
I wanted the simile to convey more than a striking image. The mother’s arms should evoke the bulk of her body and, more subtly, underscore the theme—her strong-armed ways tyrannized her family.
So I did what I’m suggesting to you below. And found the right simile: “Her arms were like the thick ends of baseball bats.”
When you avoid the cliché similes like the plague, I mean, like mud after a downpour, and choose imaginative ones, you can write effective description, heighten the reader’s experience, and deepen your theme.
Have you read any similes lately that surprised you?
PRACTICE
Choose a description of an object, either something that fascinates you or from a piece you’re working on. To describe the object, write out all the similes you can think of. Start with the ones that come easily. Get at least three or four. You’re purging your system of commonalities.
Then visualize the object; see it clearly in front of you. Even better, set it out before you (unless it’s a skyscraper or an orca). Ask yourself:
- How does it look, feel, smell, taste?
- How would a friend, sibling, stranger react to it?
- What else is this object like?
- What does this object make me think of?
Write your responses to each question. And wait and listen. Something, or several things, more will come to you. Write them all down. When your insides cry “That’s it!” you’ll know it’s the perfect, rare simile. Like my woman’s arms.
When you're finished, share a few of your favorite similes here in the comments section.
Have fun!
My favorite descriptions always involve food!
When the apple pie emerged from its oven womb, its golden crust glowed as promising as a sunrise, its aroma as enticing as a pastry shop in France. It was as crisp as the air on an autumn day and bubbly as family conversation around the holiday table.
Exquisite use of similes, Eva!
Now I’m hungry – yum!
you’ve inspired me today to pop a couple incredible similes in the proposal I’m polishing today. Hey, if they aren’t incredible, I’ll leave them out!
I think the last line says it all 🙂
Thanks!
Oops, I think you intended your comment for the blogger.
This is the first time I’ve ever heard anyone champion similes! Fab. I struggle to craft a decent metaphor yet similes seem to pop out like ready-made tarts
YC… “…like ready-made tarts,” she said, with a simile on her face.
Hmmm, I need more practice at this, but it was a fun exercise. Plus, it gave me another opportunity to praise my favorite guitar, the Fender Stratocaster!
I picked up the Strat
and looked it over. The jade pearl finish was as smooth and glossy as stones
from a tumbler. The chrome glistened like trim on a custom Harley. The weight
felt perfect, as balanced as my yoga instructor’s favorite pose. I plugged it
into an amp and started to play. The neck felt so comfortable, like my own bed
after a long trip. The tone was bright and clear, like church bells in January.
Each note was as distinct as a cardinal’s song on a spring morning. I was in
love!
I liked your church bells the best.
Thanks, Kelly
Thank you, all, for your enthusiasm and great similes. Paul, you did the exercise perfectly. And now, like the trainer of a wild stallion, a little restraint, please!
This is the entirety of what I managed in fifteen minutes.
……………………………………………………………………….
But what’s it like?
The sea.
Is it gentle like a first kiss?
Is it as chilling as bad news?
It is as refreshing as a peel of laughter
Or the gurgling laugh of a child.
It is often like the voice of god at his most vengeful
Or at his most forgiving.
It brings a shining brightness to the skin, like the rays of the sun, yet far more tangible.
But dangerous as the night and glistening like the cold steel of a blade, the sea rages.
These are extraordinary images. Very thought provoking. I liked it
I like ‘extraordinary’ it feeds my ego! Ha. Thanks.
I loved the contrast, especially in the last two lines
Cheers, mucker.
By the way, that means: ‘thank you, fellow human’ on the Isle of Wight
Ah, I was wondering about that. “Cheers” is familiar (I have a number of acquaintances in Derby & Bristol), but “mucker” was new. Thanks for clarifying!
Loved the variety of the images. Envious of your invention!
What a lovely thing to say!
SO helpful – thank you!
Not too good at similes, I have a very literal mind. However, here goes.
Gently he walked towards it, the ice crackling underfoot like breaking glass. The ice yacht lay on its side, partially submerged like a great drowning albatross, its sail rippling in the breeze like a broken wing. He went as far as he dared and lay down, his arms outstretched toward it like a man worshipping.
He felt a hand touch his, cold as a frozen cod. He grasped it and edged backward as a child might crawl from underneath a bed. At last they were on firmer ground and they stood upright as though unfurling like leaves. Safe at last.
I think it helps to just write lots of different ideas down (as you did). Having something in front of you that you don’t like crystallises the criteria you want to use. So if you say this is too X and not enough Y, you suddenly know that you need to write something that is not at all X but is very Y indeed.
Steve–Keep at it. It will get easier, and then you may have the blessed problem of too many similes. It’s only that your right brain needs a little nudging.
Alex–Great idea. As they say, Writing begets writing.
lips that curved into a smile of sweet
loveliness, like the melodic tinkling of the small child’s laugh, as kind and
gentle as the chirp of the dove, as radiant as the fragile petal of the rose.
cruel as death, cold as the icy breath of winter,
destructive as lightning
eyes cold as the winter sky at night, as deep and unforgiving as the
abyss of depression
Came up with these in minutes, and I’m only 12 years old.
i hope you don’t mind but I used lips that curved into a smile of sweet. is that ok?
I just saw this and couldn’t resist sharing a few.
She took the beating on her head as quietly as constructive criticism
Poverty turned him thoroughly like gravels in a cement mixer
He kept bugging her with the consistence of a seasoned tax-collector
He wept, the tears like two wet flies crawling down his cheek
His smile was as artificial as a mud mansion
Like a massive concrete blanket the tired wall was eager to cover them
She held the pistol on its barrel like a frightened child would hold a dead lizard by the tail
Fuck u
Here’s mine
The night came, silent as the merest breeze.
here’s mine: talking like the tides against a cliff….. hows it???
Good one 🙂